What have you learned from the 2016 Election?

My takeaways from the 2016 Presidential Election.

I believe that the 2016 election has been the worst in my lifetime.  It has caused me to reassess friendships due to wide gulfs in beliefs that I didn’t know existed between many of my longtime friends and me.  I have had to consider what acceptable behavior is and what I won’t tolerate.  I have had arguments with people about vulgarity and my “political correctness.” 

I consider myself to be a Christian first, a family man (husband and father next), a Proud American and then a Conservative.  I have spent months considering the best way to approach many of the things that are important to me.  In no particular order I will address some of them.

1.        A Woman’s Right to choose.    I believe strongly in a woman’s right to choose.  I just don’t believe that a woman has the right to choose to end the life of an unborn child.  There are numerous choices in the overwhelming majority of cases.  These include the many forms of Birth Control and abstinence.  Adoption is another choice available to women.  I understand fully the other issues (rape, incest) that come into play and can’t offer any good opinion on how to best deal with it.  I am not qualified to make that decision, but, I believe overwhelming scientific facts prove that life begins at conception.  I will leave it to people far more intelligent than me to determine what happens in those cases.  In any instance, I will not condemn anyone, regardless of their choice.  That will not make them listen to my opinion.  A kind heart and warm, loving words has the ability to persuade more people than angry protestations. 

2.       Political Correctness.   This will surprise those that know me best, but, I am sick of hearing about an unnecessary amount of political correctness.   From what I can see, those that are up in arms about political correctness are loud and angry.  I can be, and will continue to be, direct in my communications, but there is no excuse for lack of politeness.  The Republican Party, that I have been a member of for many years, can learn that a polite statement, made in a non-judgmental way has the ability to influence far more people. 

3.       Hope.  It seems to me that hope is all but lost by many of the people that should be the most optimistic.  Do we really need to “Make America Great Again?”  Are we not great now?  As we discuss the unfair playing field, we need only to think of modern day business heroes like Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Mark Cuban, JayZ, and Warren Buffett.  All of these legends started off with little and through skill and hard work are well known millionaires or billionaires.  Our leaders need to talk more about hard work, skill, overcoming adversity, better education and more rather than rail about inequality or a rigged system.  My folks were born and raised in the 1920 and 1930s, both losing their mothers at a young age during the Great Depression.  Somehow, my Mom, Dad and Aunts and Uncles persevered.   Some of my cousins were born with birth defects or developed crippling childhood disease, but, all are living the American Dream.  My father and many like him worked 2 full time jobs to provide for families.  Today, we think that the government, or someone, owes it to us not to have to do that.  We always had a roof over our head, food to eat, nice clothes, cars that worked and a paid off home by the time I was a teenager.  We can all live that life, but, sacrifices were made along the way.  My Dad rarely attended a school event, working 7 days and 70 hours each week.  He never lacked hope.  I was never bitter about him not being around.  Our time together was working on cars when maintenance needed to be done, painting the house, planting the garden and helping other family members.  There were no amusement parks and few other social events but I loved my parents and enjoyed my life. 

4.       Religion.  I am a proud Christian.  If you allow me, I will tell you my story and the impact Christ has made in my life.  I won’t until you ask me about it.  I believe in the sanctity of marriage between a man and a woman.  I loathe divorce and what it does to a family.   Having said that, I will live my life in a way that will not allow anyone to see my views unless they ask.  I embrace Freedom of Religion.  Just because I don’t believe in someone else’s God doesn’t mean that I should offend them.  Living life in a Christ Like manner will do more to influence non-believers than any words.   Just like I believe that you should have your Freedom of Religion, I should have mine as well.  Don’t restrain my beliefs to prevent you from being offended.  I will respect you in the same way.

I am sure there is more, but, this is enough for now.  The most important advice that I can give you is to go vote tomorrow and regardless of the outcome, be grateful, loving and kind. 

Fee Negotiations, it’s a negotiation, not a surrender!                     

By Tony Ventimiglio

Do you feel like you have a kick me sign on your back when you have to talk to a client about your fees?  I have been recruiting for about 4 years now and have been in professional sales since Jimmy Carter was President.  I have seen good markets, bad markets and markets in between.    In all cases, my least favorite part of the job was negotiating my fee for service.  Early in my career the scenario went something like this.  Mr. /Mrs. Client, the standard fee for our service is $ XXXX.  They counter back.  Well, that is just way too much.  XYZ Company will do it for?  My turn.  Really, well I doubt they are as good as I am.  (Of course I also tried to establish my unique value proposition.)  Then I would blurt out something like "Well let’s meet halfway and get this moving."

The problem with this scenario is most other sales people have been trained by the clients to do this so clients expect the discount.  Think about it, when you are the buyer don’t you do pretty much the same thing?  There is a better way!!!!!!!

One huge mistake is engaging in a negotiation before understanding a number of important factors. 

1.       Is the buyer/client feeling any pain from this matter being unresolved?

a.       What impact is leaving this position open having on your department?

b.      Of all of the questions that you could have asked about our service, why did you start with that one?

c.       Is your department meeting established goals with this position being open?

d.      How is this impacting your relationship with clients?

e.      Where else are you feeling pressure from?

f.        Are you the person that ultimately is affected by this?  Who else is involved in the decision making process?

g.       Tell me how this is affecting you personally. 

h.      What is your budget for fixing this?

i.         Who established the budget? 

j.        Are they aware of the costs associated if the problem is not solved?

2.       Is the person you are talking to the ultimate decision maker?

a.       Tell me a little bit about the process the last time that you decided to work with a recruiter?

b.      Who was involved other than you?

c.       Who else is involved in the interview process?  How do they feel about working with a recruiter? 

d.      Tell me a little more about the process. 

e.      Would you be the person that will be approving my proposal?

There are other areas to question as well but this is a good place to start and some future articles will dive deeper.   Let’s talk about closing!

How can you even begin to quote a fee before you have identified that the person that you are talking to is the decision maker, that they have the budget to invest in working with you, that there is sufficient motivation to make a decision to hire if you present the right candidate and that the process is one that you can live with?  It is also important that you are able to articulate your unique value proposition as well as insure that they have also identified the pain of not filling the position.  The way to insure that there is sufficient pain is to summarize the pain areas that they discussed with your earlier and ask 1 simple but powerful question; WOULD YOU LIKE MY HELP?  Why is that so important?  Well, if they don’t say yes, you are missing something.  Why start to negotiate a service agreement when you don’t even know if they believe that you are a solution to their problem?

This is probably enough for 1 article.  I hope that you found the information helpful.   Please feel free to call me with any questions that you may have.  My cell phone number is 714/329-3437. 

Living Like Max

Living like Max

This isn't the way that I intended to start this blog and the content is not quite what I intended, but, everything  has a start.  There are plenty of opportunities to learn in life if you want to find the lessons.  This is about some of the lessons that I have learned over the past 12 years from Max, our crazy, happy, loving Brittany Spaniel.  Max left us during the night.  After months of slowly becoming uncomfortable with a collapsed larynx , Max's symptoms got much worse and we took him to the Vet at 2:30 AM this morning.  We said goodbyes and wept as the Doctor and attendant injected him and he peacefully left us, all much better for the years of loyalty and love that he gave us.  As I sat up the rest of the night, reliving my happiest memories, crying  with Andrea and Adele and struggling to get composed and have a normal and productive day I decided to reflect on the lessons taught to me by my Goofball Dog. 

So what can you learn from a dog?  Well let me tell you, it is a lot more than you think and I will be a better person if I remember and practice these instructions that Max gave me.   I regret that I failed to pay attention to these treasures at the time he was teaching me but value what they will mean for the rest of my life.

YOU CAN ALWAYS BE HAPPY!  Nothing in life can prevent your happiness but you.  You control your thoughts.  You control what you focus on.   Max was a ball of happy energy, from the time that he opened his eyes each morning until he conned you to sitting on the couch and letting him cuddle next to you and fell to sleep.  Walking in the door each day after work was never the same after Max came to us.  No matter how self absorbed I was changed the moment that I encountered him.  Max focused on you, gave you all of the attention, lived for the moment and made sure that moment was great.  He was not just happy, but overflowed with it and he wanted to make sure that I was as well.  What a great gift, to be so happy that everyone around you is changed by your presence!  YOU CAN ALWAYS BE HAPPY!

IT'S NO BIG DEAL!  Do you get upset about really minor things?  I know I do.  Someone doesn't pay the attention to me that I want when speaking.  A rude driver passes and cuts me off.  I am betting I am not the only person that gets those feelings.  Max never got upset and I never saw a living creature that was more accepting of everything that happened.  We have always had at least 1 other dog and often more and also as many as 2 cats.  You all know how dogs are, a lot like us!  Some of our other furry family members would push in front of Max when eating or drinking.  In a dog's life, that is usually the beginning for a big problem.  Not for Max.  He knew that there would be more food or water when the other pets were done.   It didn't matter if it was another dog or one of the cats.  Max let them go and usually came to visit one of us with his goof look and twinkling eyes and he was as happy as could be.  The next time that you think about someone "disrespecting" you, think about that.  IT'S NO BIG DEAL!  Being patient and giving are a big part of this as well. 

ALWAYS BE LOVING, EVEN WHEN YOU THINK YOU CAN'T!  I have faced some tough times in my life and I won't suggest that losing a pet is anywhere near as tragic as losing a family member.  Last night was one of the most difficult nights that I have dealt with and in Max's final hours and minutes he never stopped loving.  Max was diagnosed with a collapsing trachea about 6 months ago.  Symptoms began to show one day when I took him for a walk and he was very much out of breath after a very short distance.  The Vet said not much could be done except to treat symptoms.  I quit taking Max for walks (One of his 500 favorite things) and the symptoms rarely presented themselves.  For a few months Max was his normal ball of loving energy and rambunctiousness.  After that time, he started to cough and spit up when excited (Every time he saw us.) or  ran too fast when chasing birds.  (Another of his 500 favorite things. )  The symptoms cleared up once we spent a few minutes to calm him.  As time went on, the cough and wheezing got worse.  He was still doing pretty well though.  I wasn't feeling well yesterday and took the afternoon off from work.  Max tagged along everywhere I went in the house and napping with me for a bit.  (His absolute number 1 favorite thing in the world.)  Max seemed good but that would change.  That reminds me of another lesson from Max.  LIFE DOESN'T NEED TO BE EXTRAVAGANT.  LITTLE THINGS ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT.  Anyway, Max was having a pretty good day.  As I am known to do, I went to bed early.  Adele came home from work about 11 and Max gave her his customary and energized greeting.  This time he didn't recover so well and the coughing and hacking continued through the night.  Adele woke me at 2:30.  I tried to calm Max as Adele had already done, but, as bad as he was doing he couldn't restrain his love.  Coughing and wheezing, he struggled to greet me.  Dropping to the floor, we all tried to calm him and it worked some, but he was really struggling not able to get a breath.  He was weakening quickly and we knew it was time.  Driving and sobbing for 20 miles and however long it took is pretty much a blur.  We got to the Vet, were taken right to an exam room and I gently put Max on the floor.  He was still gasping and not understanding what was happening, but he was most comfortable remaining right at my feet.  The attendant lead us to the main treatment area and Max was rapidly going downhill but showed no fear.  I took my hand off of him as he lay on the table thinking he may be more comfortable without my hot, heavy hand.  He picked his head up and I knew that I needed to comfort him 1 last time as did Adele and Andrea.  The Vet gave Max the injection and he quieted down, relieving him of his stress from suffocating from the collapsed larynx.    Max was gone, but a lifetime of wonderful memories and great lessons remain.

You can always be happy.  It's no big deal.  Be patient and kind.  There will always be enough.  Always be loving, even if you think you can't. Life doesn't need to be extravagant.  Little things are the most important. 

Max, my trusted friend and companion, you are greatly missed.  Thanks for the lessons and the love.

Max out for his last happy drive on Sat. 9/20.